I'm homesick today.

Homesick for Texas. Homesick for Tennessee.

In the Metro Detroit area today it is about 32 degrees and really pretty mild. There isn't a lot of wind and I'm not even wearing a big coat. After our trip to Traverse City a couple of weekends ago, there's no denying that Michigan is a beautiful state.....in some places, anyway.

But it's not home.

Its hard to really put into words what it is that I miss so much. I totally miss the mountains in TN. I miss the true sense of seasons rather than an extended winter and three shortened seasons in between. I miss the hills and the valleys and the relatively smooth roads (GOOD LORD can you say potholes???). I miss the feeling of knowing that no matter which direction you go it's going to be a beautiful drive.

But mostly I just miss that feeling that you're where you're supposed to be. I feel displaced and out of sorts. I know know how to get around but I don't CARE where I'm going. For some reason, where I am at now means nothing at all to me.....and I don't like that feeling.

Life is too short to feel this way. Hopefully this sadness will move along soon and I'll feel some sense of normalcy again, but for now.....I'm homesick.

Oy.

I'm supposed to write about a book and a song (or is it CD?) that inspires me...that describes what I stand for and aligns with my values.

Crap. This kind of thing requires thinking. A lot of thinking.

So I've thought and considered and contemplated (remind me to kill Joanie when I get to TX). Here's what I have decided:

My book choice is Telling the Truth: The Gospel as Tragedy, Comedy & Fairy Tale by Frederick Buechner. I have lots of reasons for this, the most obvious of which is that it is an examination of The Bible from the literary perspective. How genious is that!! I hold a deep and loving respect for The Bible and have spent the majority of my foray into higher education focused on the study of literature. To have such a superbly written book about the tragic, comedic and fairy tale-ish aspects of The Bible is truly remarkable....and Buechner seems to do it with such ease.

The book is only about 90 pages and yet it speaks to me in a way that most things do not. Buechner breaks down the story of salvation and exhibits how it relates to humans on all levels. It is simple but profound; a study in how The Bible demonstrates the human experience in much the same way that literature does. It affirms for me that The Bible and literature are essential to MY human experience.

For my CD I would choose "Ray Sings, Basie Swings." It's a compilation of Ray Charles singing with Count Basie's jazz band. When I was trying to figure out what musical work to choose I thought of something that I could listen to over and over and over again and never get tired of it. There are lots of other CDs I could have chosen that match that description but for me music is tied to emotion. This CD covers every emotion I could think of: happy, sad, destitute, hopeful, love sick, sick of love, etc.

Dude. I'm glad that's over. I think I have brain fatigue.

This week's blog challenge: RECIPE!

We all dig out special recipes during the holidays - some that we ONLY use at holiday time. Why do we make those dishes every year? Where did the recipe originate? Does someone request it? Would it just NOT be the holidays without it? What memories of this recipe do you have from your childhood?

Then there are the stock recipes that we ALWAYS keep ingredients on hand for. What's one of yours? What's your family's favorite dish? What do you ALWAYS make when you have company for dinner? Are you known for a certain recipe that people always request?

Challenge issued by Stacy Kocur
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So I've been a little negligent in writing and thought perhaps this blog challenge would help me get going. I mean, hell, if I can't write about food then what can I write about! :)

I suppose there are lots of different recipes I could discuss but I started thinking about what I would request if I went home and there's only one thing I consider a must-have: my mom's fried chicken. When I was a kid there was nothing more special than finding out we were having fried chicken for dinner. There never seemed to be leftovers but in the event that there was, it was usually gone by the next morning. I can remember getting up in the middle of the night to snag a piece out of the refrigerator; it was just as good cold as it was right out of the skillet! And there was nothing more annoying than discovering that one of my brothers had already beat me to the last piece.

I thought it was a miracle of motherhood to be able to reproduce chicken that tasted like my mom's; perhaps it came with the pushing of a child out of one's body, this innate knowledge of how to fry chicken that everyone begged for and fought over and shed tears of sorrow when it was all consumed. But in true humble fashion my mother insisted that it was the simplest thing in the world: "the key is in the heat," she would say.

I would pull my hair out trying to figure out what she means by "the key is in the heat." Was it a riddle? Was I supposed to put a key in the skillet? WHAT WAS THE SECRET?????

Well, here I am almost thirty-one years old and many, many skillets later I have started to get the hang of it. I still can't produce chicken that tastes as good as my mother's but I am starting to see the same response from my family as we used to give my mom when we found out it was fried chicken night. Usually my husband scarfs it down mumbling through each bite, "Man, this is good." I just sort of smile and mentally give myself a high five.

Peeps. It's been a while since I posted.

I'll keep it short 'cause we're going to Toronto this weekend and I'm supposed to be packed. And I'm not.

But I had to share this picture. My daughter and nephew were drawing on the driveway today and they drew me. So if you've ever wondered what I look like, well....here ya go. (snicker)

Y'all.

I just saw Daniel Radcliffe naked and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Well, I'm pretty sure I don't feel good about it. I'm leaning slightly toward the "ew, gross" side. And then there's the, "Wait a second! Isn't he Harry Potter?"

I'm not an HP fan (Harry Potter, that is. I'm rather non-commital about Hewlett-Packard). Never got into the books and never got into the movies and - well - frankly, I got a little tired of hearing the cast being interviewed 17 times a day until the blasted movie came out a few weeks ago.

But I digress.

So, I was perusing the message board I frequent and someone mentioned that Daniel Radcliffe was in a play where he was naked on stage for something like 10 minutes. So, I googled it. I'm getting back to that "ew, gross" feeling. Not to mention that he is about 12 and a half, right? No, seriously, I know he just turned eighteen, but c'mon. That's just downright disgusting. Disgusting, I tell ya!!

Again, I digress.

I'm going to have to learn more about this play that he's in because I want to know.....does the nudity add to the plot? I mean, seriously. It's not on a screen - it's right there in front of you, flopping around. Knowing me I'd bust out laughing just 'cause I wouldn't know what else to do. Either that or amuse myself with the little close-one-eye-and-squish-something trick.

And you've got to wonder, does the script call for ball scratching or is that just something he improvises from time to time. Good Grief.

GOOD GRIEF, fercryin'outloud.

Two names you go by:
1. Tiffany
2. Mommy (usually said twelve times in rapid succession or one long whine Mooooooooommmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!)

Two things you are wearing right now:
1. t-shirt from Old Navy
2. capris

Two things you would want (or have) in a relationship:
1. Hot lovin' (yeah, that's on the "want" list)
2. Trust

Two things you like to do:
1. Girl, spend $$!!
2. Read
3. Knit
4. Scrapbook
5. Take pictures (How many of these do I get to list? Oh yeah. Right. Two. Hmph)

Two things you want very bad at the moment:
1. To live back in the South
2. Lots of yummy sock yarn (I know, I'm so silly)

Two things you did last night:
1. Edited my brother's wedding photos
2. Ate ice cream with Morgan on the porch

Two things you ate today:
1. Iced Mocha from Starbuck's
2. Two animal crackers (hey.....it's the breakfast of champions)

Two people you last talked to:
1. Morgan
2. Miss Lorna

Two things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Taking Carter's 3 month pictures
2. Do laundry (yeah, right)

Two longest car rides:
1. Tennessee to Texas
2. Michigan to Tennessee

Two favorite holidays:
1. Christmas
2. Morgan's birthday

Two favorite beverages:
1. Dr. Pepper
2. Sweet Tea

Two things about me that you may not have known:
1. I would like to retire to England
2. I kill plants. :( Not intentionally, of course, but I'm the Dr. Death of greenery.

Two jobs I have had in my life:
1. Disability Claims Analyst
2. Photographer

Two Movies I would watch over and over:
1. An Affair to Remember
2. Sleepless in Seattle (see a trend here?)

Places I have lived: Seriously?

Two of my favorite foods:
1. Tex-Mex
2. Chocolate

Two places I'd rather be right now:
1. Italy (you & me both, Sister. Maybe we can go together!!)
2. Cambridge, England

Stuck At Home

So I am home with my four year old daughter today and I think I'm not going to make it. I'm serious. You think I'm kidding but I'm not. She is driving me crazy.

I never knew someone under four feet tall could talk that much. For the love, people, I'm telling you that it is like a never ending hole out of which comes continual high pitched talking.

Most sentences or questions begin with "Mommy." It's actually kind of ironic because I thought it was cute when she started saying my name. Now I cringe.

Okay, on the lighter side I love her more than my own life and usually I think her non-stop, incessantly inquisitive chatter is somewhere in the vicinity of adorable, but today.............not so much.

Today all I hoped for was a lazy start to the week. Climb out of bed, put on my slippers, grab a cuppa and catch up on my favorite message board until about - oh - noon when I might eat a small bite and lay down for a quick nap. You know to recharge my energy for the shower I was planning to take at around two. Shuffle around some clutter here, sort of make the bed and put away all of the toys so my husband is slightly fooled into believing that I at least made an effort to do something productive today.

Nope.

What I got instead was talking.

Talking about everything from how Elmo is for babies to why I should let her choose from my enormous stock of scrapbooking paper whenever she feels like making art for everyone and the Pope. I mean, seriously. Like I'm going to let her touch that paper. That collection of paper is my pride and joy........um, ya know......next to her, of course.

You may be wondering why the princess is home with me today and that would be a very fair and logical question......a question to which I cannot provide a reasonable and sensible answer. I mean, my best attemot would be something like she wouldn't go to sleep last night because she's got it in her head that someone has to sleep WITH her. The child has slept by herself all of her life and just within the last two weeks she has decided that she will never again be able to get a restful night's sleep unless she is clutching to me and breathing her four year old night breath directly into my nostrils.

Of course my conversation starts out rational.

"But Sweetie, you have your own bed with all of these pretty covers. If Mommy or Daddy sleeps with you it's going to make a big mess of your covers."

She suggests sleeping together in my bed so that if we make a big mess of the covers it doesn't matter.

"Sweet Pea, big girls can sleep by themselves. And you are SUCH a big girl now. You can go potty by yourself, you can draw beautiful pictures (see referenced picture making above), you can almost ride your bike without training wheels. Why, I'm surprised you need Mommy at all!"

She wants to know why I sleep with Daddy if big girls can sleep by themselves. She also notes that she will not ride her bike tomorrow if I will sleep with her.

"Okay, Sweetheart. I've been patient with you. I've sung songs, I've rubbed your back, we've said your night-night prayers, I kissed your babies, you've gone to the bathroom and had a sip of water and we played paper-rock-scissors to see who gets to say the rules (that's a whole other post) so you should be more than ready to go to sleep. I promise if you just close your eyes and be still for five minutes you will go to sleep."

This prompts the water works with a comment that all she wants is to go to sleep while holding my arm.

Ugh. I don't know what to say about the arm holding. So I start making the transition toward mean-mommy.

"Go to sleep. It's time to go to sleep. I'm right downstairs if you need anything."

Five minutes later I hear feet. Small feet. Damn! She's up and she's calling me from the top of the stairs. Doesn't she want Daddy instead? No, it must be Mommy.

"What is it, Baby? What do you need?"

Am I hearing this? Am I going to laugh out loud because she just said that she can't find a cold place for her feet and she can't sleep with hot feet because it makes her legs hot and then her hands?

You see where this is going, right? We started this bedtime adventure at 8:30. It was after 11:00 before I was convinced she was asleep.

So Sleeping Beauty didn't wake up until almost 9:30 today. Since she is my alarm clock and I take her to daycare once she wakes me up, I also did not wake up until 9:30. Too late to go today.

That means we get to spend the WHOLE day together. And she gets to talk to me ALL day.

Am I in hell?