Stuck At Home
So I am home with my four year old daughter today and I think I'm not going to make it. I'm serious. You think I'm kidding but I'm not. She is driving me crazy.
I never knew someone under four feet tall could talk that much. For the love, people, I'm telling you that it is like a never ending hole out of which comes continual high pitched talking.
Most sentences or questions begin with "Mommy." It's actually kind of ironic because I thought it was cute when she started saying my name. Now I cringe.
Okay, on the lighter side I love her more than my own life and usually I think her non-stop, incessantly inquisitive chatter is somewhere in the vicinity of adorable, but today.............not so much.
Today all I hoped for was a lazy start to the week. Climb out of bed, put on my slippers, grab a cuppa and catch up on my favorite message board until about - oh - noon when I might eat a small bite and lay down for a quick nap. You know to recharge my energy for the shower I was planning to take at around two. Shuffle around some clutter here, sort of make the bed and put away all of the toys so my husband is slightly fooled into believing that I at least made an effort to do something productive today.
Nope.
What I got instead was talking.
Talking about everything from how Elmo is for babies to why I should let her choose from my enormous stock of scrapbooking paper whenever she feels like making art for everyone and the Pope. I mean, seriously. Like I'm going to let her touch that paper. That collection of paper is my pride and joy........um, ya know......next to her, of course.
You may be wondering why the princess is home with me today and that would be a very fair and logical question......a question to which I cannot provide a reasonable and sensible answer. I mean, my best attemot would be something like she wouldn't go to sleep last night because she's got it in her head that someone has to sleep WITH her. The child has slept by herself all of her life and just within the last two weeks she has decided that she will never again be able to get a restful night's sleep unless she is clutching to me and breathing her four year old night breath directly into my nostrils.
Of course my conversation starts out rational.
"But Sweetie, you have your own bed with all of these pretty covers. If Mommy or Daddy sleeps with you it's going to make a big mess of your covers."
She suggests sleeping together in my bed so that if we make a big mess of the covers it doesn't matter.
"Sweet Pea, big girls can sleep by themselves. And you are SUCH a big girl now. You can go potty by yourself, you can draw beautiful pictures (see referenced picture making above), you can almost ride your bike without training wheels. Why, I'm surprised you need Mommy at all!"
She wants to know why I sleep with Daddy if big girls can sleep by themselves. She also notes that she will not ride her bike tomorrow if I will sleep with her.
"Okay, Sweetheart. I've been patient with you. I've sung songs, I've rubbed your back, we've said your night-night prayers, I kissed your babies, you've gone to the bathroom and had a sip of water and we played paper-rock-scissors to see who gets to say the rules (that's a whole other post) so you should be more than ready to go to sleep. I promise if you just close your eyes and be still for five minutes you will go to sleep."
This prompts the water works with a comment that all she wants is to go to sleep while holding my arm.
Ugh. I don't know what to say about the arm holding. So I start making the transition toward mean-mommy.
"Go to sleep. It's time to go to sleep. I'm right downstairs if you need anything."
Five minutes later I hear feet. Small feet. Damn! She's up and she's calling me from the top of the stairs. Doesn't she want Daddy instead? No, it must be Mommy.
"What is it, Baby? What do you need?"
Am I hearing this? Am I going to laugh out loud because she just said that she can't find a cold place for her feet and she can't sleep with hot feet because it makes her legs hot and then her hands?
You see where this is going, right? We started this bedtime adventure at 8:30. It was after 11:00 before I was convinced she was asleep.
So Sleeping Beauty didn't wake up until almost 9:30 today. Since she is my alarm clock and I take her to daycare once she wakes me up, I also did not wake up until 9:30. Too late to go today.
That means we get to spend the WHOLE day together. And she gets to talk to me ALL day.
Am I in hell?
So I am home with my four year old daughter today and I think I'm not going to make it. I'm serious. You think I'm kidding but I'm not. She is driving me crazy.
I never knew someone under four feet tall could talk that much. For the love, people, I'm telling you that it is like a never ending hole out of which comes continual high pitched talking.
Most sentences or questions begin with "Mommy." It's actually kind of ironic because I thought it was cute when she started saying my name. Now I cringe.
Okay, on the lighter side I love her more than my own life and usually I think her non-stop, incessantly inquisitive chatter is somewhere in the vicinity of adorable, but today.............not so much.
Today all I hoped for was a lazy start to the week. Climb out of bed, put on my slippers, grab a cuppa and catch up on my favorite message board until about - oh - noon when I might eat a small bite and lay down for a quick nap. You know to recharge my energy for the shower I was planning to take at around two. Shuffle around some clutter here, sort of make the bed and put away all of the toys so my husband is slightly fooled into believing that I at least made an effort to do something productive today.
Nope.
What I got instead was talking.
Talking about everything from how Elmo is for babies to why I should let her choose from my enormous stock of scrapbooking paper whenever she feels like making art for everyone and the Pope. I mean, seriously. Like I'm going to let her touch that paper. That collection of paper is my pride and joy........um, ya know......next to her, of course.
You may be wondering why the princess is home with me today and that would be a very fair and logical question......a question to which I cannot provide a reasonable and sensible answer. I mean, my best attemot would be something like she wouldn't go to sleep last night because she's got it in her head that someone has to sleep WITH her. The child has slept by herself all of her life and just within the last two weeks she has decided that she will never again be able to get a restful night's sleep unless she is clutching to me and breathing her four year old night breath directly into my nostrils.
Of course my conversation starts out rational.
"But Sweetie, you have your own bed with all of these pretty covers. If Mommy or Daddy sleeps with you it's going to make a big mess of your covers."
She suggests sleeping together in my bed so that if we make a big mess of the covers it doesn't matter.
"Sweet Pea, big girls can sleep by themselves. And you are SUCH a big girl now. You can go potty by yourself, you can draw beautiful pictures (see referenced picture making above), you can almost ride your bike without training wheels. Why, I'm surprised you need Mommy at all!"
She wants to know why I sleep with Daddy if big girls can sleep by themselves. She also notes that she will not ride her bike tomorrow if I will sleep with her.
"Okay, Sweetheart. I've been patient with you. I've sung songs, I've rubbed your back, we've said your night-night prayers, I kissed your babies, you've gone to the bathroom and had a sip of water and we played paper-rock-scissors to see who gets to say the rules (that's a whole other post) so you should be more than ready to go to sleep. I promise if you just close your eyes and be still for five minutes you will go to sleep."
This prompts the water works with a comment that all she wants is to go to sleep while holding my arm.
Ugh. I don't know what to say about the arm holding. So I start making the transition toward mean-mommy.
"Go to sleep. It's time to go to sleep. I'm right downstairs if you need anything."
Five minutes later I hear feet. Small feet. Damn! She's up and she's calling me from the top of the stairs. Doesn't she want Daddy instead? No, it must be Mommy.
"What is it, Baby? What do you need?"
Am I hearing this? Am I going to laugh out loud because she just said that she can't find a cold place for her feet and she can't sleep with hot feet because it makes her legs hot and then her hands?
You see where this is going, right? We started this bedtime adventure at 8:30. It was after 11:00 before I was convinced she was asleep.
So Sleeping Beauty didn't wake up until almost 9:30 today. Since she is my alarm clock and I take her to daycare once she wakes me up, I also did not wake up until 9:30. Too late to go today.
That means we get to spend the WHOLE day together. And she gets to talk to me ALL day.
Am I in hell?
posted by Tiffany | 8:58 AM
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